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Ba-Dun, Tsch!
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Rambling
Thursday. 12.26.13 9:23 am
I've never had the problem with getting along with someone's parents before.
Friends, old boyfriends, all their parents liked me. I became a second daughter to most of them. every time a relationship ended with a guy the parents seemed to be just as upset as the guy I use to date. I could go to a friends house and sit around with their parents for an hour or so just chit chatting and joking around and connecting with them. I connect with people. Its what I do. its what I'm good at.

But now I'm in a situation where there is no strong connection to the parents what so ever. His Mom doesn't live in the area so that's a little understandable. I think she likes me okay. We never have any deep conversations about life and we never really joke around but we get along okay. If there was one word to describe our relationship I would choose "pleasant". There's hardly any tension for her and I to be uncomfortable with each other. Though the effort will be completely on my shoulders, I know that I could have that stronger connection to her if I tried harder and put more pressure on her to have a stronger presence in her son's life. (by inviting her over more and trying to do things with her). Both of them are terrible at communicating so if she's going to get closer to her son, I feel like I need to make a bigger effort to bond with her first.

Then there's his dad....
We use to get along very well! He joked with me and would ask me about my life and work and family. Then the whole thing with my car happened. My car is a lemon. Always has problems. He started asking a lot of questions and I became frustrated with him for grilling me about my car so much and I may have decided to end the conversation before he was ready to and he got upset. Well, that was two years ago. Ever since then, our relationship has gotten more and more strained. Every attempt we would have at a conversation would end awkwardly and he would always pick and prod at everything I said and question it. With work, and why I dropped out of college, and why I haven't gone back, and family stuff. every time we'd have a conversation, this would happen.

The car rides home after these meetings always ended the same way. I'd be upset that his father didn't like me. Scott would reassure me that he did like me. That I was being paranoid and that I was over thinking things.

Now our relationship goes like this...
"Hello" *quick hug*
*he would talk to everyone else BUT me*
"See you later" *quick hug*


And yesterday at Christmas everyone got a card from him that had personal notes for all of them in the card. everyone opened their cards at the same time and everyone was reading their cards for 30 seconds or so and I finished mine in 5 seconds. Scott's sister showed her fiance what he wrote in her card and vis versa and his brother and wife did the same thing later in the day and Scott got a nice note in him. Mine just said "Merry Christmas" and then he signed it. Not gonna lie, that really hurt my feelings. Everyone got a nice message from him in a card but me.

For the last year I was trying to convince myself that I was over thinking things. that he wouldn't have helped us to get our house if he didn't like me. That all the tension was brought on by me and that I am misunderstanding his behavior.

But to write everyone else a note in their card and not put anything in mine....
I mean, If you think I'm stressing about it too much and that it isn't a big deal, tell me! I can't help but take it as a sign that he has nothing nice to say to me and that he doesn't like me.

I know that there are tons of people who have in-laws that they don't really get along with but since I've never had to deal with a parent not liking me before, I'm really struggling with it.

I miss Scott's Uncle so much.
He was the one person that accepted me immediately and showed me nothing but love and treated me as family right away.


But throwing all that to the side, everything else about my Christmas was awesome! Scott's Niece is super adorable and has changed so much since the last time we saw her! My Nephews didn't want anything to do with me but understandably so since they had a mountain of toys to play with. haha. It was great spending the morning with my family and I enjoyed spending time with Scott's siblings. This weekend we'll be going to Scott's Grandfather's house and spending time with him and I'll see a good chunk of my extended family on Friday!

I hope everyone had a great Christmas!
Sorry for my ramble.
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